Who am i to judge?

Who am I to judge?

It is human tendency to form an opinion about someone .Bias exists across society.  Anyone who doesn’t conform to our way of thinking is quickly stereotyped and put in some box or labeled some ‘type’.

I remember my conversation with my great grandfather, Anna (the non-initiates may refer to my earlier blog ‘Bala aahe ka’) after my first day in a new school… 

Anna: Did you make any friends?

 Me: Pulkit.

Anna: Pulkit means what? 

 Me: Don’t know, will find out.

 So the next day I asked Pulkit and came home and told Anna “Pulkit says Pulkit means happy”. 

He shook his head with an exasperated grimace and rephrased the question “What is Pulkit?” 

With my limited knowledge of grammar, I felt the question sounded wrong. I was nine. 

He then went on to clarify “Is he a Brahmin or Non Brahmin?”

 I shrugged and said “Don’t know, he is just my friend”. 

That was the era when all South Indians thought that all North Indians were Punjabis and all North Indians thought that all South Indians were Madrasis. 

Even today, many people still think that Tamil, Malayalam, Kannada & Telugu are all the same language classified under “Undu Gundu”.

Other than the Indian language bias, there was also this tendency to judge people by the way they spoke English or by the music they listened to or the movies they watched. There was a phase when anyone who listened to non English music or preferred 

speaking in Hindi or their mother tongue was termed a “Vern”, short for vernacular.

 I have met some amusing people. I knew this guy who said “b@!!$” instead of “b%b$” For example “Mosambi Chatterjee has very nice b@!!$” I must say that his choice of words in describing  the female anatomy was rather unusual.

This chap also had this weird nail on the little finger of his left hand which he let grow and it was almost two inches long. He even applied nail polish on it so he had a pink pinky.  His ‘cutiecolour ‘choice was indeed disconcerting.

People are also judged by the way they dress. When I was a kid, if a guy wore pink or an earring, he was considered gay. As I grew older I realized that some guys like to wear pink or earrings and that’s ok and I now understand  that some  guys  are gay and that’s ok too.

There was also this phenomenon of the ‘tikli type’... Girls who wore western outfits but had a bindi on their forehead.  I suppose that comes from the Hindu tradition in some families where girls always have a bindi. I now think that it’s totally their choice and one should respect that.

Coming to think of it, that Mosambi Chatterjee fan wasn’t exactly my bosom buddy but was a very helpful guy who once rushed me to the hospital when I hurt my ankle and ensured that I was ok.

I admit I had a tendency to judge people on their appearance or by the way they spoke, but I am trying to change.

 So I started accepting that people are different and everyone isn’t like me. The way they are could be because of their upbringing, culture, social environment or just how they are wired.

It’s not that I have become a saint or that I don’t judge people anymore.

It’s just that I try not to judge people by their English skills, sense of dressing, food habits or even sexual inclination.

I do, however, still form opinions based on their conduct, attitude and behaviour. 

I just keep it simple and divide people into two categories. Those who are

Chu#iyas  and those who are not!